Sunday, June 17, 2007

A Moment Of Reason...

The last week was action packed. We had a major production release, during which a super-critical system of the bank went down. Pandemonium!!! But the way the switch to stand-by was done made me proud to be an IT Engineer :) Highly efficient and super quick. No major customer impact.

Owing to a few business decisions, the last few days have been torture. They made me question the value of my efforts as a project team member in the context of the project.

I have seriously considered moving away from all this over the last 3 days. My heart was no longer strong enough to fight and I saw no purpose to stay in Tokyo, if things would keep going the way they would. I felt totally drained of all strength, felt confused and hurt. Quite simply, I was devastated by the rollback.

But speaking to Prasanna last night really helped me gain some perspective about the reason why things happened the way they did. It told me the context which I was unable to figure out for myself. It taught me that there are bigger things in life and at Shinsei than a release rollback.

One of my key learnings and observations at Shinsei has been that the workload and pressure on almost all of my colleagues is much, much higher than it is on me. I am barely facing 1% of the issues that they see daily, have faced for a long time. But these being my initial days in the industry, I am still learning. Learning that I am nowhere the epicenter of work, nowhere as good as these people and have miles to go to be as good as them.

Arun, Zarina, Prasanna, Nikhil san, Sharad san, Sanjeev, Tushar san, Bala. I really admire these people for their calibre, work ethic, patience, intelligence, calm thinking and ability to make things happen in the face of all odds. I want to emulate them and in some small way put in practice what I have silently learnt from them.

That hope, Prasannas words and a silent dream that I have had for a long time. These 3 things have calmed me down and made me want to stay again.

Its a new day. Its a new start. BRING IT ON!!!

2 comments:

Moonraker said...

Hey nice blog dude....
I m also joining IT industry and will face the same amount of chalenges... hope i stand up to them too.....

Once again nice blog :D...

Maverick said...

@moonraker: not just in IT, each place its the same iv heard :)

"koi bach na paye" seems to be the thought ;)

all said and done, just chill and jo hoga so hoga... fatega toh see denge ;)