Sunday, January 14, 2007

A Life of Heart and Hope...

This is my 100th article :) I set up a domain name in Nov 2005 and started blogging in Dec 2005. What started out as a minor experiment has grown into an integral part of my life, where I voice my opinions, present cases the way I see them and give a medium to a love of mine: Writing.

Blogging has enabled me to explore the world sitting in my seat, understand the opinions of countless people across the world, get honest and critical information on subjects I have researched and above all, helped me grow as an individual, when I have sat down to write on a certain issue and debated it internally and many a time even changed my views to accomodate that which is principally correct.

A hundred articles is nothing. I know people who have written much much more and considerably better and amazingly. But still, we keep milestones for most things in life and a hundred being a round figure, so be it to look back and look forward.

I have seen amazing skill, word play, anguish, euphoria, biased views, practicality. Writing says so much about an individual... I have been able to look into the lives that people lead across the world, indulged myself with the photography they have done, learnt a bit more about my friends from the way they write... Basically more than giving anything back to anyone or society, I have been the receipient of many such experiences which have helped me grow constantly and just learn and enjoy some of all the beauty that exists in this glorious world of ours.

I have shared my views, fears, wins, disappointments, happiness, all seen through my eyes, and at each step, after writing and posting, I have felt a strange sense of calm. It's been almost like therapy, except that in this case, it is my own internalization of the concepts and the views and the principles I stand for, that have helped me fight out the cases in my own mind and derive conclusions

A few years back, my life was without direction or purpose. Living made no sense except for that I refused to quit, even though I wasn't knowing what would come tomorrow. It wasn't a life and I don't have a vocab good enough to describe it. But probably the words genesis and reincarnation would be coarsely close to the actual intended meaning. After that period, I see so many transformations in myself, so many ways that my thinking has changed. Somewhere the innocence died, and yet somewhere that was replaced by pragmatism and a long forgotten will power. One might call it an internal turn around.

By the time I started blogging, it was this new person writing his views, his ideas, sharing his aspirations, letting go of the past. There was a steel somewhere and God's protection, arising from the good deeds of people who have come before me. A thankfulness for the good things and a determined approach to face the world on my own terms. Somwhere, I would have loved not to change, because changing has meant accepting certain practical constraints as realities. Changing has helped me become more aware of the machinations of this world around me. But changing has also helped me know how to beat the odds and to believe in myself.

In life, people have tried to push me down using the maxim: "Majority wins." And they have been successful for the better part. I concede defeat and accept my failure and faults. But in my humble opinion, the heart is the strongest element of human existence. Whether it be an animal or Man. The heart sets us apart from everything that cannot feel. And I have always believed that even if the majority is against one, one must still always listen to the heart, because in most cases, the heart is never wrong.

People say I don't write for anyone other than myself and that I am a selfish writer who doesn't care for his readers. It is true probably, whether intended or otherwise. But for me, my blogging has always been a case of people reading and their hearts telling them whether to agree or disagree with me and my views, rather than being told to follow what the majority says.

I have nothing to set me apart from anyone else. I have n things wrong and wish to correct in myself. But I have a heart which is good. And I have hope...

For, when someone reads my post and later tells me: "Hey, I felt the same way you did... And reading your post made me feel positive." I feel a joy that somewhere we have shared a bit of our lives with each other. And I feel happy that somewhere I touched a heart. For in all the 100 articles uptil now, I have never "written" per se. I have only shared my heart's feelings and my hope for life with you...

1 comment:

Ships said...

yes dear, u indeed touched many hearts :)